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Entry tags:
Hound of Ulster
Title: Hound of Ulster
Fandom: Fate/stay night, Shin Megami Tensei: Devil Survivor
Character(s): Lancer, Cu Chulainn
Pairing(s): None
Genre: Humor
Word Count: 555
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: None
Summary: Two Cu Chulainns walk into a bar.
Notes: This is an Arioch. (Not safe for your brain.)
On one hand, Lancer was utterly lost.
On the other hand, there was a bar in front of him.
Lancer decided that things weren't too bad, and opened the door.
The first thing about the bar he noticed was the clientele. It was safe to say that he'd been to a lot of bars in his day, but very few of them had robot angels, tiny snowmen, starfish with one eye, and malicious-looking sheep all in one place. Actually, very few of them had any of those at all.
He approached the bartender, an elephant of some kind. "What've you got that's good?" Always a fair leading question when you didn't know the territory.
"Not the usual, Cu- wait. No." The elephant gave him an appraising look. "Must've mistaken you for somebody else. You really look just like-"
"Cu Chulainn, isn't it?" A measured voice came from beside him before the spitting image of himself sat down. Different armor, white with blue accents instead of blue with white accents and with a swooshier cape than he ever wore. And bigger, elfier ears. But otherwise, spitting image. "The usual, please."
As the bartender went to fetch the drinks, Lancer raised an eyebrow. "I was pretty sure that was my name," he commented.
"I wouldn't be too surprised. Travelers come to this bar often enough from other realities... I've run into some...one with my name once before, though it wasn't particularly pleasant. -No, you don't want to know how that went or even what he looked like. It wasn't as close a match, to say the least." When the bartender returned - the same drink for both of them - Cu Chulainn thanked him and sipped his glass. "Tell me of your travels, self of mine."
So Lancer talked about the Holy Grail War. Getting summoned, his original and actually good Master getting killed by a shitty priest, and not being allowed to have a decent fight. Cu Chulainn nodded along and expressed sympathy for being forced to serve a dishonorable master.
"What about you, what are you up to?" Lancer asked, after he was done.
"I've contracted with a group of humans to help them stop their city from being wiped out during a demon infestation." He frowned slightly. "I am a bit concerned, as of late. Their leader keeps eyeing the entry of... Do you know anything about demon fusion?"
"Not a clue."
"As I thought. Demons such as I can combine with other demons to gain more power. We lose most of our consciousness in the process, but it's preferable to death, and an inevitable part of a contract. We usually have preferences to what we become, but what our master orders, we obey. My master has been paying close attention to Arioch's entry in the fusion list."
He made a gesture towards another demon in the bar, and Lancer turned to look at a hideous, bloated, fleshy demon with a tongue sticking out of its giant-
Lancer jerked his head away. "You'd become that thing?!"
"He was not exactly my first choice. But what my master orders, I will do." Cu Chulainn took another drink. "Compared to that, even the crow would be more comfortable for me."
"...I'm not sure if I'm more worried about that or that that thing is a he."
Fandom: Fate/stay night, Shin Megami Tensei: Devil Survivor
Character(s): Lancer, Cu Chulainn
Pairing(s): None
Genre: Humor
Word Count: 555
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: None
Summary: Two Cu Chulainns walk into a bar.
Notes: This is an Arioch. (Not safe for your brain.)
On one hand, Lancer was utterly lost.
On the other hand, there was a bar in front of him.
Lancer decided that things weren't too bad, and opened the door.
The first thing about the bar he noticed was the clientele. It was safe to say that he'd been to a lot of bars in his day, but very few of them had robot angels, tiny snowmen, starfish with one eye, and malicious-looking sheep all in one place. Actually, very few of them had any of those at all.
He approached the bartender, an elephant of some kind. "What've you got that's good?" Always a fair leading question when you didn't know the territory.
"Not the usual, Cu- wait. No." The elephant gave him an appraising look. "Must've mistaken you for somebody else. You really look just like-"
"Cu Chulainn, isn't it?" A measured voice came from beside him before the spitting image of himself sat down. Different armor, white with blue accents instead of blue with white accents and with a swooshier cape than he ever wore. And bigger, elfier ears. But otherwise, spitting image. "The usual, please."
As the bartender went to fetch the drinks, Lancer raised an eyebrow. "I was pretty sure that was my name," he commented.
"I wouldn't be too surprised. Travelers come to this bar often enough from other realities... I've run into some...one with my name once before, though it wasn't particularly pleasant. -No, you don't want to know how that went or even what he looked like. It wasn't as close a match, to say the least." When the bartender returned - the same drink for both of them - Cu Chulainn thanked him and sipped his glass. "Tell me of your travels, self of mine."
So Lancer talked about the Holy Grail War. Getting summoned, his original and actually good Master getting killed by a shitty priest, and not being allowed to have a decent fight. Cu Chulainn nodded along and expressed sympathy for being forced to serve a dishonorable master.
"What about you, what are you up to?" Lancer asked, after he was done.
"I've contracted with a group of humans to help them stop their city from being wiped out during a demon infestation." He frowned slightly. "I am a bit concerned, as of late. Their leader keeps eyeing the entry of... Do you know anything about demon fusion?"
"Not a clue."
"As I thought. Demons such as I can combine with other demons to gain more power. We lose most of our consciousness in the process, but it's preferable to death, and an inevitable part of a contract. We usually have preferences to what we become, but what our master orders, we obey. My master has been paying close attention to Arioch's entry in the fusion list."
He made a gesture towards another demon in the bar, and Lancer turned to look at a hideous, bloated, fleshy demon with a tongue sticking out of its giant-
Lancer jerked his head away. "You'd become that thing?!"
"He was not exactly my first choice. But what my master orders, I will do." Cu Chulainn took another drink. "Compared to that, even the crow would be more comfortable for me."
"...I'm not sure if I'm more worried about that or that that thing is a he."