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Entry tags:
if you love me let me go
Title: if you love me let me go
Fandom: Bungou Stray Dogs
Character(s): Dazai, Odasaku
Pairing(s): pre-Dazai/Odasaku
Genre: …I think this is fluff about suicide?
Word Count: 505
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Suicide mention
Summary: “For your double suicide. Why do you ask only women?”
Notes: Today's RL notes: RL Dazai asked his (male) friend to commit double suicide with him at least once, and RL Odasaku was jealous as hell.
“Dazai,” Odasaku says, setting his drink down, “why only women?”
Dazai tilts his head at him, a little confused by the question. They’re alone in the bar, except for the bartender, who is quiet. “I think that’s a matter of brain chemistry! Although even leading scientists haven’t figured out exactly why-”
“That’s not what I meant,” Odasaku interrupts. “For your double suicide. Why do you ask only women?”
“Isn’t it a more beautiful suicide with a beautiful woman involved?” Dazai asks. “That just follows logically.”
Odasaku looks down at his drink. “I wouldn’t know.”
“Besides, death and sex have always been linked. The French call climax ‘the little death’ and they’re far from the only ones to-” Dazai pauses as something clicks. “Odasaku, you couldn’t possibly be jealous that I’ve never asked you to die with me, could you?”
“Why would I be jealous of something like that?” Odasaku asks, eyes slightly narrowed. “I want to live.”
“I know you do. But that doesn’t mean you don’t want to at least be asked.” Dazai gives Odasaku a wide smile, and reaches for his hand.
Odasaku lets him take it. His hands are larger and rougher than Dazai’s, but Dazai holds Odasaku’s hand with all the tenderness he usually affords to a woman he’s flirting with.
“Odasaku, won’t you join me in a wonderful double suicide?” Dazai asks. “We can hang ourselves together, drown ourselves in the river… Or, your gun that’s never killed anyone - let’s break it in in the most beautiful way we can.”
Odasaku is very still and silent, looking down at their joined hands rather than at Dazai’s face. Even for Dazai, it’s hard to tell what he’s thinking.
So Dazai goes on. “There’s no truer expression of friendship than being willing to die together, is there? I would gladly spend my last moments in this terrible world by your side.”
“Dazai,” Odasaku says, softly, finally looking at Dazai’s face. “I won’t die with you.”
Dazai nods, and lets go of his hand. “That’s what I thought you’d say.”
“But thank you for the offer,” Odasaku adds. When Dazai raises an eyebrow, Odasaku says, “It means a lot to you. So I’m grateful you included me in that part of your life.”
“You were jealous,” says Dazai, laughing a little. It’s easier to tease him than to think about the full implications of what Odasaku’s saying.
Odasaku looks away. “I guess I was, a little.”
“Ah, Odasaku… If you ever change your mind, let me know and I’ll gladly join you in death.” When Odasaku doesn’t acknowledge him further, Dazai takes a sip of his drink, and the subject is dropped for the evening.
It would be beautiful to die together with his dearest friend in the world, maybe even more beautiful than dying by the side of the most gorgeous woman, but-
-somehow, Dazai thinks it would be a bit of a shame for Odasaku to leave this world so soon. Maybe even enough of a shame for him to decline.
Fandom: Bungou Stray Dogs
Character(s): Dazai, Odasaku
Pairing(s): pre-Dazai/Odasaku
Genre: …I think this is fluff about suicide?
Word Count: 505
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Suicide mention
Summary: “For your double suicide. Why do you ask only women?”
Notes: Today's RL notes: RL Dazai asked his (male) friend to commit double suicide with him at least once, and RL Odasaku was jealous as hell.
“Dazai,” Odasaku says, setting his drink down, “why only women?”
Dazai tilts his head at him, a little confused by the question. They’re alone in the bar, except for the bartender, who is quiet. “I think that’s a matter of brain chemistry! Although even leading scientists haven’t figured out exactly why-”
“That’s not what I meant,” Odasaku interrupts. “For your double suicide. Why do you ask only women?”
“Isn’t it a more beautiful suicide with a beautiful woman involved?” Dazai asks. “That just follows logically.”
Odasaku looks down at his drink. “I wouldn’t know.”
“Besides, death and sex have always been linked. The French call climax ‘the little death’ and they’re far from the only ones to-” Dazai pauses as something clicks. “Odasaku, you couldn’t possibly be jealous that I’ve never asked you to die with me, could you?”
“Why would I be jealous of something like that?” Odasaku asks, eyes slightly narrowed. “I want to live.”
“I know you do. But that doesn’t mean you don’t want to at least be asked.” Dazai gives Odasaku a wide smile, and reaches for his hand.
Odasaku lets him take it. His hands are larger and rougher than Dazai’s, but Dazai holds Odasaku’s hand with all the tenderness he usually affords to a woman he’s flirting with.
“Odasaku, won’t you join me in a wonderful double suicide?” Dazai asks. “We can hang ourselves together, drown ourselves in the river… Or, your gun that’s never killed anyone - let’s break it in in the most beautiful way we can.”
Odasaku is very still and silent, looking down at their joined hands rather than at Dazai’s face. Even for Dazai, it’s hard to tell what he’s thinking.
So Dazai goes on. “There’s no truer expression of friendship than being willing to die together, is there? I would gladly spend my last moments in this terrible world by your side.”
“Dazai,” Odasaku says, softly, finally looking at Dazai’s face. “I won’t die with you.”
Dazai nods, and lets go of his hand. “That’s what I thought you’d say.”
“But thank you for the offer,” Odasaku adds. When Dazai raises an eyebrow, Odasaku says, “It means a lot to you. So I’m grateful you included me in that part of your life.”
“You were jealous,” says Dazai, laughing a little. It’s easier to tease him than to think about the full implications of what Odasaku’s saying.
Odasaku looks away. “I guess I was, a little.”
“Ah, Odasaku… If you ever change your mind, let me know and I’ll gladly join you in death.” When Odasaku doesn’t acknowledge him further, Dazai takes a sip of his drink, and the subject is dropped for the evening.
It would be beautiful to die together with his dearest friend in the world, maybe even more beautiful than dying by the side of the most gorgeous woman, but-
-somehow, Dazai thinks it would be a bit of a shame for Odasaku to leave this world so soon. Maybe even enough of a shame for him to decline.