just a sip

[misheard]

Title: just a sip
Fandom: Fate/Grand Order
Character(s): Lobo, Hessian, Shuten-douji, Beni-enma, Ibaraki-douji, Suzuka Gozen
Pairing(s): None
Genre: Humor
Word Count: 200
Rating: PG
Warnings: None
Summary: The oni attempt to include Lobo. There are some problems with inviting a wolf to a drinking party.
Notes:

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Oni are fine.

An oni may look like a human at times, but their mind is closer to a beast. They kill to eat, crush the weak underneath their heels, and howl at the moon.

So Lobo doesn’t mind oni. Their scent doesn’t offend him.

That doesn’t mean he understands them any better, though.

“Oh? What’s the matter, sweetie?” Wine is spilling over the edge of the cup Shuten offers to him. It smells bad, and Hessian pushes it away.

“Wolves can’t have alcohol, chirp.” Beni-enma’s tone is scolding. “It’s rude to offer someone food they can’t eat.”

“Ehhh? No drinking at all?” Ibaraki asks. “Drinking and rioting is one of the most fun things there is to do!”

“They can’t have candy either,” Beni-enma says, before Ibaraki can ask about it. “Sugar is bad for them.”

“I wasn’t gonna share my sweets anyway,” Ibaraki says defensively.

“That’s totes a bummer,” Suzuka says, her arms stretched out behind her head. “Can’t have booze, can’t have choco, can’t have coffee… What else is there to get a buzz off of?”

Lobo barks once, and a short, thoughtful silence falls over the group.

“…What about w-”

“Do not give Lobo weed, Suzuka.”