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Entry tags:
something heavier than hope
Title: something heavier than hope
Fandom: Bungou Stray Dogs
Character(s): Chuuya, Atsushi
Pairing(s): pre-Chuuya/Atsushi
Genre: Hurt/Comfort
Word Count: 770
Rating: PG
Warnings: Spoilers for 15
Summary: Chuuya and Atsushi find they have something in common; Chuuya offers unasked for advice.
Notes: BSD rarepair week day 1, prompt: letting go.
One of the few things Chuuya remembers from ‘before’ is his full name, not that it matters any.
Absolutely no one calls Chuuya by his family name. Most of the Port Mafia’s lower ranks don’t even know what it is. He’s “Chuuya” and nothing else. Chuuya might not even respond if someone were to yell “Nakahara” in a crowded place.
He probably has a family, in the sense that two people provided genetic material for him to be born. He doesn’t know anything else about those people and he doesn’t care to find out.
Kids with loving parents don’t end up as government experiments.
So he’s put exactly no effort into investigating the Nakahara family, and neither does he care much about the bloodlines of anyone else. The Port Mafia is a family of its own, and the detectives’ relatives are only of interest as possible hostages if (when) the Port Mafia and the Detective Agency break their uneasy truce. Otherwise, what does he care if a Fukuzawa or a Nakajima shows up in the news?
Atsushi, apparently, feels differently. They’re meeting in a bar for an exchange of information on neutral ground, and when the TV that’s tuned to some sports station mentions ‘Nakajima Kazuki’, Atsushi’s head swivels so hard that Chuuya could swear he hears a bone crack.
“Nakajima isn’t exactly a rare name, you know,” Chuuya says, less because he cares and more because he doesn’t like being ignored.
“Ah, I know, sorry…” Atsushi turns back to Chuuya, but he keeps glancing back to the TV every two seconds.
Chuuya rolls his eyes. “You should know better than to ignore a mafia executive in front of you. Even if he was related to you, so what?”
There’s a few seconds where Atsushi just stares at him like he’s trying to understand the meaning of those words. Finally, he croaks, “What?”
“Obviously nobody’s coming looking for you, or they would’ve found you by now. You’re not exactly hard to find,” Chuuya replies. Atsushi cringes, but if he was expecting Chuuya to soften his words, he’s more of an idiot than he seems. “If anybody knew about your ending up an orphan, they didn’t care enough to take you in. What are you expecting if you find a distant relative, a tearful reunion? Please.”
Without meeting Chuuya’s gaze, Atsushi says, “But… I’d still like to know if I have any family left.”
“You don’t.” Before Atsushi can accuse him of knowing something about his situation that he doesn’t, Chuuya goes on. “You might have people who’re related to you somewhere, but if you have any family it’s the detective agency.”
Atsushi’s expression changes from pained to something like understanding. “…Chuuya. Are you also an orphan?”
Talking about his own history was not what Chuuya intended for this meeting. “Close enough to one. But we were talking about the Guild, not our personal lives.” His tone makes it very clear that they are going to get back to business.
“Right, sorry for getting sidetracked…”
Somehow they manage to finish exchanging information without further digression. Chuuya is just turning to leave when Atsushi says, “Chuuya?”
While it’s tempting to just go, Chuuya turns his head to look back at Atsushi.
“I think it’s really admirable that you don’t let your history get to you, and…” Atsushi’s fidgeting. He would never make it in the mafia with nerves that show that easily. “I just wanted to say that I hope I can be a little more like you. At least when it comes to moving on.”
…What a painfully genuine kid. It’s better that the detective agency found him before the mafia had a chance to snatch him up: Chuuya knows they’d break him within a month or two. Honesty and openness are weaknesses for them.
He’s not good at responding to genuine admiration, at least not admiration over things other than fighting skills or looks. But since he can’t let that go without a response, he gently pats Atsushi on the shoulder, grinning when he sees Atsushi’s face turn pink.
“Keep working on that. If our organizations have another meeting, get yourself sent as the envoy instead of that shitty Dazai, and we’ll talk.”
It’s certain that their organizations will break their truce, and almost certain that it’ll be soon. Until that time, Chuuya doesn’t mind being the one to act as the Port Mafia’s messenger, especially if this is who he’s paired with.
Atsushi’s an enemy in the end, but the kind of pain that comes from longing for an unknown family isn’t the kind of pain that Chuuya inflicts.
Fandom: Bungou Stray Dogs
Character(s): Chuuya, Atsushi
Pairing(s): pre-Chuuya/Atsushi
Genre: Hurt/Comfort
Word Count: 770
Rating: PG
Warnings: Spoilers for 15
Summary: Chuuya and Atsushi find they have something in common; Chuuya offers unasked for advice.
Notes: BSD rarepair week day 1, prompt: letting go.
One of the few things Chuuya remembers from ‘before’ is his full name, not that it matters any.
Absolutely no one calls Chuuya by his family name. Most of the Port Mafia’s lower ranks don’t even know what it is. He’s “Chuuya” and nothing else. Chuuya might not even respond if someone were to yell “Nakahara” in a crowded place.
He probably has a family, in the sense that two people provided genetic material for him to be born. He doesn’t know anything else about those people and he doesn’t care to find out.
Kids with loving parents don’t end up as government experiments.
So he’s put exactly no effort into investigating the Nakahara family, and neither does he care much about the bloodlines of anyone else. The Port Mafia is a family of its own, and the detectives’ relatives are only of interest as possible hostages if (when) the Port Mafia and the Detective Agency break their uneasy truce. Otherwise, what does he care if a Fukuzawa or a Nakajima shows up in the news?
Atsushi, apparently, feels differently. They’re meeting in a bar for an exchange of information on neutral ground, and when the TV that’s tuned to some sports station mentions ‘Nakajima Kazuki’, Atsushi’s head swivels so hard that Chuuya could swear he hears a bone crack.
“Nakajima isn’t exactly a rare name, you know,” Chuuya says, less because he cares and more because he doesn’t like being ignored.
“Ah, I know, sorry…” Atsushi turns back to Chuuya, but he keeps glancing back to the TV every two seconds.
Chuuya rolls his eyes. “You should know better than to ignore a mafia executive in front of you. Even if he was related to you, so what?”
There’s a few seconds where Atsushi just stares at him like he’s trying to understand the meaning of those words. Finally, he croaks, “What?”
“Obviously nobody’s coming looking for you, or they would’ve found you by now. You’re not exactly hard to find,” Chuuya replies. Atsushi cringes, but if he was expecting Chuuya to soften his words, he’s more of an idiot than he seems. “If anybody knew about your ending up an orphan, they didn’t care enough to take you in. What are you expecting if you find a distant relative, a tearful reunion? Please.”
Without meeting Chuuya’s gaze, Atsushi says, “But… I’d still like to know if I have any family left.”
“You don’t.” Before Atsushi can accuse him of knowing something about his situation that he doesn’t, Chuuya goes on. “You might have people who’re related to you somewhere, but if you have any family it’s the detective agency.”
Atsushi’s expression changes from pained to something like understanding. “…Chuuya. Are you also an orphan?”
Talking about his own history was not what Chuuya intended for this meeting. “Close enough to one. But we were talking about the Guild, not our personal lives.” His tone makes it very clear that they are going to get back to business.
“Right, sorry for getting sidetracked…”
Somehow they manage to finish exchanging information without further digression. Chuuya is just turning to leave when Atsushi says, “Chuuya?”
While it’s tempting to just go, Chuuya turns his head to look back at Atsushi.
“I think it’s really admirable that you don’t let your history get to you, and…” Atsushi’s fidgeting. He would never make it in the mafia with nerves that show that easily. “I just wanted to say that I hope I can be a little more like you. At least when it comes to moving on.”
…What a painfully genuine kid. It’s better that the detective agency found him before the mafia had a chance to snatch him up: Chuuya knows they’d break him within a month or two. Honesty and openness are weaknesses for them.
He’s not good at responding to genuine admiration, at least not admiration over things other than fighting skills or looks. But since he can’t let that go without a response, he gently pats Atsushi on the shoulder, grinning when he sees Atsushi’s face turn pink.
“Keep working on that. If our organizations have another meeting, get yourself sent as the envoy instead of that shitty Dazai, and we’ll talk.”
It’s certain that their organizations will break their truce, and almost certain that it’ll be soon. Until that time, Chuuya doesn’t mind being the one to act as the Port Mafia’s messenger, especially if this is who he’s paired with.
Atsushi’s an enemy in the end, but the kind of pain that comes from longing for an unknown family isn’t the kind of pain that Chuuya inflicts.